Watching the Detectives - Elvis Costello

Nice girls, not one with a defect

Cellophane shrink-wrapped, so correct

Red dogs under illegal legs

She looks so good that he gets down and begs

She is watching the detectives

"Ooh, it's so cute"

She's watching the detectives

When they shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot

They beat him up until the teardrops start

But he can't be wounded 'cause he's got no heart

Long shot of that jumping sign

Invisible shivers running down my spine

Cut to baby taking off her clothes

Closeup of the sign that says "we never close"

You snatch a chill and you match a cigarette

She pulls your eyes out with a face like a magnet

I don't know how much more of this I can take

She's filing her nails while they're dragging the lake

She is watching the detectives

"Oh, he's so cute"

She is watching the detectives

Oh, and they shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot

They beat him up until the teardrops start

But he can't be wounded 'cause he's got no heart

You think you're alone until you realize you're in it

Now baby's here to stay, love is here for a visit

They call it instant justice when it's past the legal limit

Someone's scratching at the window, I wonder, who is it?

The detectives come to check if you belong to the parents

Who are ready to hear the worst about their daughter's disappearance

Though it nearly took a miracle to get you to stay

It only took my little fingers to blow you away

Just like watching the detectives

Don't get cute

Just like watching the detectives

I get so angry when the teardrops start

But he can't be wounded 'cause he's got no heart

Watching the detectives

It's just like watching the detectives

Watching the detectives

Watching the detectives

Watching the detectives

Watching the detectives

Watching the detectives

Watching the detectives