Act III
(after the song ends)
This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... As you can see, MUSIC can get you
pretty fucked up... Take a tip from Joe, do like he did, hock your imaginary guitar
and get a good job... Joe did, and he's a happy guy now, on the day shift at
the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen, arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of
a fully-charged icing anointment utensil. And every time a nice little muffin comes
by on the belt, he poots forth... And if this doesn't convince you that MUSIC
causes BIG TROUBLE... then maybe I should turn off my plastic' megaphone and
sing the last song on the album in my regular voice...
SCENE EIGHTEEN
A LITTLE GREEN ROSETTA
CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER:
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
You'll make a muffin betta
With a green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A tiny green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
You'll make a muffin betta
Betta
It's really getting betta
It's betta, it's betta
With a green rosetta
Green rositti
A little green rositti
It's really, really meaty
A little green rositti
Betta, betta,
(Hey, really out there... really good)
It's really getting betta
It's betta, it's betta
With a green rosetta
Setta, setta
(Good God, give the drummer some)
Green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
(Setta, setta, setta, etc...)
(Make a muffin, make a muffin, make a muffin,
Make a muffin betta, make a muffin betta, etc...)
With a green rosetta
A little green rosetta
(Etc...)
Good God! You're really jammin! Now the Reggae version, hey, for the People in
the Third World... we haven't forgotten anybody on this song. .for all of you French
people... who think that you re outta sight... And for the people in Spain... who think
the French people are where its at... And for the people in Mongolia who always
wanted to go to Spain for a vacation... And for those of you in Taiwan who got chumped,
this chorus is for you: (Rang Tang Ding Dong, I am the Japanese Sandman...
Take eight...)
Green rosetta
Green rosetta
A little green rosetta
(Against the Reggae beat, though... No, it's still Reggae, but it s all backwards)
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
You'll make a muffin betta (Etc., etc., etc...)
Now you see, some places in the Third World it might be difficult to dance to this because
the kerosene record player is not a very efficient device. .And a lot of times they run out of,
they run out of spunk right in the middle of the chorus... Causing the song to sound like this...
A little green rosetta
However we continue in spite of the fact that the fuel may be low on your record player.
We suggest that in places like the Fourth World where things are really tough that you
keep the record player going by rubbing two sticks together. And if all else fails, throw
the record away... build your own green rosetta... try this recipe: Well start with a lump of
grass... the grass bone connected to the ankle bone... the knee bone connected to the
wishbone... and then everybody moves to New York and goes to a party with Warren.
Hey! And we've flown in, at great expense, (triple scale, no less, ladies and gentlemen),
Steve Gad's clone to play the out-chorus on this song... he's really outa-site, in spite of
the fact that the click track is totally irrelevant to what he's doing now. I'm listening to
the click, yes I'm suffering with the click track right now... this guy is totally out of sync with it,
but what the fuck. Ed Mann will call him up later, show him the sign. Okay Vinnie, where
is five?
They're pretty good musicians
They re pretty good musicians
They're pretty good musicians
They're pretty good musicians
But it don't make no difference
If they're good musicians
Because anybody who would buy this record
Doesn't give a fuck if there's good musicians on it
Because this is a stupid song
AND THAT'S THE WAY I LIKE IT
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
You make a muffin betta
With a little green rosetta
A little green rosetta
Rosetta, rosetta, rosetta
(etc., etc., etc...)
AL MALKIN.
Zetta.
