The Madison Panty-Sniffing Festival - Frank Zappa

FZ: Well it's contest time ladies and gentlemen. Direct from Madison,

Wisconsin, it's the Madison Panty-Sniffing Festival, just as promised.

Vinnie: Cough!

FZ: Heavy duty? Maroon nylon heavy duty. Okay . . . Light blue cotton with tiny

skid . . . . That's getting him very excited because it appears that the bottom

parts of those pants are welded together. Okay let's try this, alice blue nylon

. . .

Vinnie: These smell like the same ones I had last night.

FZ: For those of you who didn't hear he says those smell like the same ones he

had last night. Did you like them? You don't like those?

Vinnie: Maybe they are, maybe she's following us around.

FZ: Black Nylon!

Vinnie: Ooooohhhh please!

FZ: Black Nylon, re . . . e-hem, registring a 19 on the Richter scale.

Vinnie: Oh, God . . . gotta keep on . . . hah hah, it's fuckin' disgusting!

FZ: These are very light blue and apparently have come in contact with some

corrosive material that has eaten the bottom out of it.

Vinnie: China syndrome.

FZ: What?

Vinnie: China Syndrome!

FZ: Yeah, ha ha ha ha ha! Awright, rustic hokey pokey, model number thirteen.

Vinnie: Oorhh, nehh. (hack, hack)

FZ: Blue with the little embroidered things on the front.

Vinnie: This smells like armpits. Ugh . . .

FZ: Okay who wins? Those belong to Chuck Eldridge.

Ike: Hi.

FZ: Sorry.