Yesterday I signed my first tit
Soft with the pen because I didn't want to burst it
I did it cursive. I took my sweet time
I tried to put my personality in each line
Like I do with each rhyme
Cause in the worst case
That's what put this bust in my custody in the first place
Now I'm rounding first base, cruising cause I paid dues
Dude, I called my roommates and I gave them all the great news
They're pitiless
But so many nights up at the motel 6, tittyless
After gigs with hideously small crowds
It's been 5 years of playing colleges in small towns
I'm through with all doubt
I'm ready to bloom from wallflower
And just ball out
And live my fantasy
And if I get my name on a grammy it's for my family
But for me I just can't top the memory of my john hancock on that mammary
Why are we
Shy to be
Who we all would like to be?
Write your name so big and bold that the entire world can see
Although you
Can't undo
All the pain that you've been through
The future's here, and it's tangible
And kind of spongy
I'm a commie but I love my fucking country right now
Just let play the fillmore and die now
I couldn't give a damn about who's raising an eyebrow
I thought I'd failed, I prayed for so long
God said "no way," but I'm all like, 'come oooon'
And he's all like "okay"
And at first I'm all like "don't play"
But then I'm all like "hooray!"
And I grabbed that baton
And ran like a Cavs fan, away from Lebron
Now they gab about me in banks and salons
And they're mad to admit it, but pale kid's the bomb
From anonymous geek
To Don Juan in a week
And I'm calm
But if ever I seem gloomy
I can't stress enough how much this means to me
I held the tears in, cause I didn't dare to dream
Of the most beauteous boobie I've ever seen
Right now (repeat)
Right right right right on my command
The world is a booby that's in the palm of my hand
