03' Adolescence - Live - J. Cole

I grew up, a fucking screw up

Tie my shoe up, wish they was newer

Damn need something newer

In love with the baddest girl in the city

I wish I knew her

I wish I weren't so shy, wish I was bit more fly

I wish that I, could tell her how I really feel inside

That I'm the perfect nigga for her, but then maybe that's a lie

She like a certain type of nigga

And it's clear I'm not that guy

Ball player, star player, I'm just watching from the side

On the bench

cause my lack of confidence

won't let me fly

I ain't grow up with my father

I ain't thinkin' bout that now

fast forward four years or so from now

I'll probably cry

When I realize what I missed, but as of now my eyes are dry

Cause I'm trying to stay alive

In the city where too many niggas die

Dreamin' quiet trying to dodge a suit and tie

Who am I? Aye who am I?(Yeah)

Things change, rearrange and so do I

It ain't always for the better, dawg, I can't lie

I get high cause the lows can be so cold

I might bend a little bit but I don't fold

One time for my mind and two for yours

I got food for your thoughts to soothe your soul

If you see my tears fall just let me be

Move along, nothing to see

I always did shit the hard way

My nigga Squirrel slangin' in the hallway

Burnt CD's and trees like this was Broadway

Times Square, kept the dimes there in the locker

Some Reggie Miller

With more brown hairs than Chewbacca

Whispers that he got it for the low low, sell a

Dime for a dub, them white boys ain't know no better

Besides, what's twenty dollars to a nigga like that?

He tell his pops he need some lunch and he gon' get it right back

I peep game

Got home snatched my mama keychain

Took her whip, the appeal, too ill to refrain

I hit the boulevard pull up to my nigga front do'

His mama at home, she still let em' hit the blunt though

I told her hello, and sat with my nigga and laughed

And talked about how we gon' smash all the bitches in class

I complimented how I see him out here getting his cash

And just asked, "What a nigga gotta do to get that?

Put me on," he just laughed when he seen I was sure

17 years breathing his demeanor said more

He told me, "Nigga, you know how you sound right now?

If you wasn't my mans, I would think that you a clown right now

Listen, you everything I wanna be that's why I fucks with you

So how you looking up to me when I look up to you?

You bout to go get a degree, I'ma be stuck with two choices:

Either graduate to weight or selling number two

For what? A hundred bucks or two a week?

Do you think that you would know what to do if you was me?

I got, four brothers, one mother that don't love us

If they ain't want us why the fuck they never wore rubbers?"

I felt ashamed to have ever complained about my lack of gear

And thought about how far we done came

From trailer park to a front yard with trees in the sky

Thank you mama, dry your eyes, there ain't no reason to cry

You made a genius and I, ain't gon' take it for granted

I ain't gon' settle for lesser, I ain't gon' take what they handed

Nah I'm gon' take what they owe me and show you that I can fly

And show old girl what she missing, the illest nigga alive

Aye who am I?

Things change, rearrange and so do I

(Aye who am I?

It ain't always for the better, dawg, I can't lie

(Who am I?)

I get high cause the lows can be so cold

I might bend a little bit but I don't fold

One time for my mind and two for yours

I got food for your thoughts to soothe your soul

If you see my tears fall just let me be

Move along, nothing to see

I never felt better