I'm Glad I'm Not Young Anymore (2004 Remastered Version) - Matt Monro

Poor boy! Poor boy!

Down-hearted and depressed and in a spin

Poor boy! Poor boy!

Oh, youth can really do a fellow in!

How lovely to sit here in the shade

With none of the woes of man and maid

I'm glad I'm not young anymore

The rivals that don't exist at all

The feeling you're only two feet tall

I'm glad that I'm not young anymore

No more confusion

No morning-after surprise

No self-delusion

That when you're telling those lies

She isn't wise

And even if love comes through the door

The chance that goes on forevermore

Forevermore is shorter than before

Oh, I'm so glad that I'm not young anymore

The tiny remark that tortures you

The fear that your friends won't like her too

I'm glad I'm not young anymore

The longing to end the stale affair

Until you find out she doesn't care

I'm glad that I'm not young anymore

No more frustration

No star-crossed lover am I

No aggravation

Just one reluctant reply

"Lady, goodbye!"

The Fountain of Youth is dull as paint

Methuselah is my patron saint

I've never been so comfortable before

Oh, I'm so glad that I'm not young anymore