The Big Bright Green Pleasure Machine - Alternate Version - Simon & Garfunkel

Do people have a tendency to dump on you?

Does your group have more cavities than theirs?

Do all the hippies seem to get the jump on you?

Do you sleep alone when other sleep in pairs?

Well, there's no need to complain

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We can neutralize your brain

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Now

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Do figures of authority just shoot you down?

Is life within the business world a drag?

Did your boss just mention

That you'd better shop around?

To find yourself a more productive bag

Are you worried and distressed?

Can't seem to get no rest?

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Now

Buy a big, bright, green, pleasure machine